Monday, 21 May 2018
BREAKING NEWS

Michelle Wolf stole her jokes from Donald Trump

Michelle Wolf stole her jokes from Donald Trump
14 May
3:47

Michelle Wolf sure got criticized for the jokes she told at the recent White House Correspondents’ Dinner. People from both the political left and right felt that she had crossed the line, as if there is “a line” anymore. There may have once been “a line” but that was before Donald Trump ran for president.

Critics said that Wolf’s jokes contained obscenities, name calling, and body shaming, so, like, maybe Michelle Wolf should run for president in 2020.

Trump, who did not attend the WH Dinner as president for the second time, tweeted afterwards: “This was a total disaster and an embarrassment to our great Country and all that it stands for.”

Ha, ha! That guy is a real card, isn’t he?

Imagine, Donald Trump of all people calling the WH Dinner “an embarrassment to our great Country and all that it stands for” right after he gave a speech in Michigan in which he ripped the entire United States legal system by saying “We have the worst laws anywhere in the world.” “Our laws are so corrupt and so stupid” “And the laws are so corrupt, they are so corrupt.”

Now that’s not to say that Mr. Trump was not justified in expressing anger concerning one aspect of the WH Dinner because he certainly was.

Here he is, most likely sitting all alone in his motel room, savoring his awesome performance just completed in Michigan that same evening at one of his typical pep rallies where he rambles on about anything that pops into his head. Out of curiosity, he fires up his phone to watch a replay of the WH Dinner, and what does he hear? Why, Michelle Wolf cracking up the crowd—while using Trump’s material!

I’m sure that Trump was downright apoplectic when Michelle used the ‘p’ word several times. Like when she said, “Of course, Trump isn’t here, if you haven’t noticed, he’s not here. And I know, I know, I would drag him here myself, but it turns out the president of the United States is the one p____ you’re not allowed to grab.”

“That’s my line!” Trump probably yelled. “I once said something like that about women, and now she’s using it and getting more laughs than I ever did! I hate these journalists!”

Then imagine how he most likely reacted to this Michelle Wolf zinger: “Here we are at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Like a porn star says when she’s about to have sex with a Trump, ‘Let’s get this over with.’”

Oh man, can’t you just hear Trump’s indignation? “She stole my story! The porn star thing is mine! I’m going to sue her for plagiarism!”

What was even more galling is that Michelle Wolf tried to beat Trump at his own game by sprinkling obvious lies throughout her talk. She said things like her porn star name is Reince Priebus and that Trump is not rich, in fact he’s broke.

But then Trump could smile with a bit of satisfaction knowing that he outdid her when it comes to lying in his just completed Michigan speech where he said things like “We have spent 7 trillion dollars in the Middle East” “Chrysler is moving back to Michigan from Mexico” and “Some people would say that we have essentially gotten rid of it [Obamacare].” Stuff like that.

Michelle Wolf apparently thought it was funny to call people names. She called Trump a racist, Mike Pence a weirdo, and Kellyanne Conway a liar. And just where did Michelle Wolf ever get the idea that calling people derogatory names was funny? Why, from The Donald of course.

While watching her speech, I’m sure that Trump was not impressed with Wolf’s name-calling. “Crooked Hillary, Lyin’ Ted, and Crazy Megyn, now those are funny!” he probably thought.

Probably the part of her routine that earned Michelle Wolf the most public flack was her reference to Sarah Huckabee Sanders’ eyeshadow. Some saw this as criticizing Sanders’ appearance. But that’s only because they missed the point which actually had to do with Sanders telling lies to the press to cover for her boss’s lies.

Then there were the usual clichés by Wolf concerning Mitch McConnell’s neck and Chris Christie’s girth. But no one seemed to notice or care about those. Yet, try as she may, Michelle Wolf simply was not going to eclipse Donald Trump when it comes to body shaming people.

Surely we’ll never forget Trump’s desperate attempts for laughs with his description of MSNBC’s Mika Brzezinski “bleeding badly from a facelift.” His Carly Fiorina insult: “Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?” Or his “Miss Piggy” slam of Alicia Machado, the 1996 Miss Universe winner from Venezuela.

Megyn Kelly summed up Trump’s body-shaming talent nicely by telling him, “You’ve called women you don’t like ‘fat pigs,’ ‘dogs,’ ‘slobs’ and ‘disgusting animals.” Naturally he got back at Kelly with more body shaming.

It’s probably fortunate that Trump, lacking the courage of his female staff members, did not attend the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Sitting there watching Michelle Wolf steal his shtick, the president might have choked on his filet mignon.

Mike Murphy of Pocatello is an award-winning columnist whose articles are syndicated by Senior Wire. He recently published a book titled “Tortoise Crossing – Expect Long Delays,” which is a collection of 100 of his favorite columns. It is available on Amazon.com.

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